Silence is Boring, Talking is Exciting …

Last Sunday, we had a small get-together of a few friends. We met over dinner at a defense club. The setting was picture-perfect. It was a rainy night. It was drizzling with a bit of chill in the air. The green lush lawn was soaking in the water. Surrounding the lawn were the old-fashioned decorative yellow lamps. The yellow rays beaming out of these lamps were playing with the raindrops, making the ambiance tranquil and peaceful.

We were sitting on the veranda, overlooking the lawn. Everyone was excited. They were discussing, debating, gossiping, boasting, and enjoying. We were there for almost three hours. In those three hours, I may have spoken ten sentences. Most of the time I was listening while watching the rain dancing on the lawn. I was answering a few questions while sipping my drink and passing remarks in between. I too was enjoying the company of my friends but silently, without any words. Just like the raindrops falling on the lawn. Slowly, silently, calmly…

Most of the time I rarely speak. It’s not that I do not wish to talk more. But I cannot. Even when I am with my best friends, I am silently listening rather than talking. To remain silent has become my way of life. I tried a lot to change this behavior. I made efforts to talk more, but I wasn’t successful. Old habits die hard. And I realized that I am more comfortable being silent than talkative.

Way back in 2011, I did Vipaasaana meditation. During Vipassana, you cannot talk to anyone for ten days. You have to remain silent throughout the course. You are not supposed to even make eye contact with anyone. Mobiles are also not allowed. You are just observing yourself. Everyone felt it was very difficult to keep silent for ten days. But for me, it wasn't a big deal. I was as such used to keeping silent. Hence I enjoyed this meditation. After this meditation, now I can sit in one place for hours together watching the sky without doing anything. This ability of "not doing anything" is the inner strength of silence. After undergoing Vipaasaana, I became more quiet, more observant, more aware.

I do not know if being silent is a strength or a weakness. But it is the fact that silent people like me are very boring. Who would want to sit with a person who doesn't utter a word for hours together? I have realized that no one likes the company of boring people. Everyone wants to listen to something new and exciting. Listening to the sound of silence requires a great amount of patience and ability. One has to make sincere and deliberate efforts to understand the language of silence. Who would wish to engage so much time and energy to understand such people? And why should they? Hence, no one prefers them and so the silent people have very few friends. Neither do they have a strong social network. They rarely have any excitement around them.

However, those who talk more, and can narrate stories, create excitement around them. They entertain others and grab attention. This is a great soft skill. And it pays rich dividends in professional as well as personal life. People who talk more have many friends. They have a large social network. They have great abilities to attract people around them and hence everyone likes them. Whereas the silent guy has to choose his path and have the conviction to walk on it for miles together. He is almost always a loner. It is a tough call. There is no companion. There is no excitement. There is only silence. Eternal silence.

The same human behavior applies to stock market investment and trading. Trading creates a lot of excitement whereas long-term investment is very boring. By human nature, we love excitement. We feel happy when something is always happening around us. We always long for the thrill. We rarely want to see the status quo. We are eager to do something. Even if that may not be fruitful, for the sake of excitement, we want to jump in. We want to be part of the crowd. We want to be involved in the momentum. We do not want to be an observer. We want to participate irrespective of the situation. We are etching to experience the thrill. The excitement of trading is so irresistible that even at the cost of severe losses we want to enjoy it.

However, on the other hand, like a silent person, long-term investing is very boring. Nothing is happening around. There is no excitement. There is no noise. There is no news. You are all alone. You are just observing and letting go. Years pass by and your portfolio does not move even by an inch. It is a very difficult phase. And hence, very few can remain unaffected by this lack of excitement and keep silent.

Be it investing or day-to-day life, if you show adequate patience, and can just sit without doing anything, silence will reward you handsomely. But for that, you must have a divine gift to perceive the silence as it is without speaking even a single word. That is the key!!!

A new Urdu gazalkar Tahzib Hafi says:-

हम शायरोंके मसअले भी कुछ और हैं

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